Random trashy tv and movie thoughts brought to you by hi, I’ve been spending too much time inside:
1. I don’t really want to learn to cook from Kelli Kapowski or any of the Sister, Sisters. I would, however, switch lives with Debi Mazer in a freaking heartbeat.
Ok, I admit I am curious to try Tia’s cauliflower pizza crust, it looked kind of amazing.
2. Thank you for destroying “My Sharona”, Hormel. I want to shoot an arrow right through that guy’s stupid drum. I will not be putting your pepperoni on my cauliflower pizza.
3. I think Khloe may be the only Kardashian with a soul. I wish she’d stop trying to turn herself into one of her sisters.
4. Gillian Anderson is exquisite.
5. If you’re making millions of dollars designing and flipping houses and you discover that your illegal immigrant workers have been squatting in a two foot high crawl space to relieve themselves because you were too fucking cheap to rent a portable bathroom and all you have to say is “They should’ve held it”.
I hope you choke on your money and die.
6. Imagine waking up tied to a bed by your young sons. They’re armed with a magnifying glass and sunlight, superglue and some tiny scissors. They don’t believe you’re their real mommy.
This is Goodnight Mommy, the Austrian film I just watched, one of the best horror movies I’ve seen recently. Figuring out the “twist” about five minutes into the movie didn’t detract from the shimmering sense of dread for me at all. Plus the isolated landscapes are filmed with haunting beauty.