I’m Such A Woman, Or: Why Words Matter

Are other people as bothered by the weird little phrases that people use?

For instance, some lady was saying “I’m such a woman, I can’t decide (insert whatever decision she needed to make here).”

And part of me wants to reply “Oh lawdy, I’d give you advice but my uterus literally makes it impossible for me to even help you try to make a decision. PLZ go ask a less flighty, serious-minded male.”

Because I don’t spend my days making hundreds of choices for two businesses, one household, four children and our assortment of pets. And all of the other women I know are dithering and incompetent princesses.

Yeah, I get that she didn’t seriously mean to say that all women are indecisive and foolish, but why even have that phrase in your repertoire? It’s these small things that we rarely think about, yet they shape the opinions of society and the way young girls grow up thinking of themselves.

Phrases I’d rather see in use:

I’m such a woman, I just fixed the bathroom sink.

I’m such a woman, I just balanced our budget for the month.

I’m such a woman, I’m going to cure cancer one day.

I hit like a girl, I fight like a girl. Fierce and fearless. You will have to kill me, bury me and salt the earth before I ever stop.