How To Disappear Completely and Never Be Found

I think I’m going to lay off looking for signs of intelligent life on Facebook for a while. It’s a hard choice for me. Do I just go full echo chamber and block the people who leave gross comments? If I do that, why ever post anything? Do I just shut up and post cute kitten pictures, and if so, how is that in any way representative of my personality?

I’m not super sensitive in the sense that I don’t hold grudges. If you say something homophobic or racist or anti-woman, sure I will call you a colorful name, but then I will block you and your problems will cease to be mine.

One exchange I got myself into a week or so ago has been weighing on my mind, though. It ended with the statement:

“I don’t care about facts.”

The context doesn’t matter much. but I know you kittens like the tea, so. Someone had posted a meme about the school shootings, saying something along the lines of “those stupid ass retard liberals are replacing their porch lights with red bulbs to show they’re anti-gun”. (The apparent concept being that this would show criminals which houses to break into without fear of armed homeowners.) The poster and their buddies were all in high dudgeon, contemplating about how red lights indicate a Certain Kind of district and how fitting it was that the retard ass liberals were definitely going to get fucked. Up the ass. With a gun. Hurhur. It was super precious and adorable and I’m sure they were all good God-loving folk.

Because I enjoy being stung by a thousand fire ants, I ventured in with a link from Snopes explaining that this meme was several years old, originated on a satirical site and was 100% not true.

Immediately, of course, my comment was bombarded with more memes calling me a stupid ass retard liberal. I guess once they land on a concept they stay married to it, no matter how grammatically appalling. Anyway, this is where the woman proceeds to say “I don’t care about facts.” I replied that this was obvious, I just didn’t understand WHY.

This is the problem I’m running into again and again with Trump supporters. He doesn’t let facts get in his way and neither do they. In this unfettered state, they can say anything they want and if you show them verifiable proof to the contrary, they simply double down or call you names. Change the subject, start rambling about Hillary.

How can there ever be any common ground in that? The nicer ones try to say things like “we’ll just agree to disagree”, but you know what? I don’t agree to disagree with your completely fabricated fantasies. That’s like saying COMPLETE, KNOWING LIES hold the same value as independently verifiable truth. They don’t.

I suppose I support your right to live in the fantasy world of your choosing, but while you’re there, your actions are causing actual harm in the real world. Water, air and land are being needlessly, almost maliciously polluted. Endangered species are being slaughtered. Women’s rights are being stripped away. Your tiny-brained leader is treating this country as a combination of Monopoly and Risk, and he isn’t very good at either one.

Anyway. My point was, if you don’t see me around it means I’m off searching for a place where facts matter. Or at least where ice cream doesn’t make you fat. I’m willing to settle.

And for those of you who don’t want to talk about politics, here’s a partial list of things that are currently making me happy.

  • The new Trading Spaces. The only reboot of any kind that matters. #TEAMFRANK.
  • It’s been Very Blustery here. On our walks, my little dog keeps trying to convince me to fly him like a kite. He says he just needs a tiny flight suit and some goggles and we could make it happen.
  • Maybe I’ll start a GoFundMe for that. Or for, like, a tank of helium and a lot of balloons.
  • A new Sailor J video!
  • A shiny stack of new books where each one sounds so good I can’t even make a choice.
  • Conversations with my niece, who is seven.

We’re playing with a set of brass bells. She has named them Bella, Bellatrix and Belthor. Suddenly she holds Bella’s clapper so it doesn’t ring and says “Oh no, Bella has lost her voice!” I say “Oh no! Where did it go?” She replies “I think it was stolen by the patriarchy!”

Just then, another kid comes into the room and asks if she wants to play a game. She replies “In a minute! Jigi and I have to go overthrow the patriarchy first!”

So yeah. If I do nothing else right in this lifetime, there’s that.